Marriage joke on break up

George: If you don't mind me asking, why did your marriage to Janice break up?

Bill: It was due to sickness.

George: I didn't know you or Janice had been ill!

Bill: We hadn't. I just got sick of Janice.


Jokes and humor category: Man and woman jokes and humor

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Marriage diet

A newly married couple in a shopping mall...

Wife: Stop looking at girls, you are married now!

Husband: You mean if I'm on a diet, I can't even look at the menu?


Moral: Men will be men!

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Lucky man

Man: I want a divorce. My wife hasn't spoken to me in six months.

Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!

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Husband - Who?

A man who surrenders when he's wrong, is 'honest'.

A man who surrenders when he's not sure, is 'wise'.

But a man who surrenders when he's right, is surely a 'husband'.

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Millionaire husband

A woman was telling her friend, "It's me who has made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?", asked the friend. The woman replied, "A multi-millionaire."

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Merits of having 2 wives

Some men strongly reasons in the merits of having 2 wives, because they believe...

Firstly: Monopoly is always damaging.

Secondly: Competition improves service.

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Blind love

"They say that love is blind. Well, then, marriage truly justifies to be an institution for the blind!"

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Wedding humor

Question: Why do men want to marry virgins?

Answer: Because they can't stand criticism.

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Dog bit wife

Man: I took my dog to the vet today because it bit my wife.

Friend: Did you have it put down?

Man: Of course not! I just had its teeth sharpened.

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Adam and Eve

Just think, if Adam and Eve were married, it surely would have been a peaceful and the happiest married life ever. Because He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to tolerate his mother's old recipes.

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The husband needs some rest

After thoroughly checking a man (accompanied by his wife) at his clinic...

Doctor: Your husband is perfectly all right. He only needs some rest, that's all. Just take this sleeping pills.

Wife: When should I give them to him?

Doctor: Oh no, those are for you.

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The reality...!

True Friends stand by you in your bad times.

Do you want documentary proof for this?

Just check out your marriage album, you will see all true friends surrounding you!


Moral: Only a 'married' person knows, what exactly it means.

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Marriage blues

Some wise men had said sometime:

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man worries about his future after he gets a wife.

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